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How To Deal With Pain Body In Others

How to deal with pain body in others artwork of samurai standing on mountain range.

Once you know what to look for, you can distinguish between someone and their pain body. This makes them far easier to deal with, and means that you will not take on or get involved in any drama.

Seeing Through The Illusion

Noticing the arising or activated pain body in someone else means that you are seeing the illusion. Therefore you can see through it. You are seeing that it is a foreign entity acting through them, rather than believing the negative behaviour is who they are.

It is past pain that is trapped inside the person, acting out. It possesses the individual, and the individual does not even know it.

From here compassion arises more easily. You are not sucked into the drama. You can allow the pain body to play itself out or exhaust itself - which may happen quicker as you remain in a state of intense presence.

Who you used to think someone was, now just is seen as part of their conditioning that they have not yet woken up from.

Pain body can manifest in different ways - anger, jealousy, hatred, anxiety, depression, any negative state of emotion that the person is identified with. Someone can go from being in a pleasant, kind and happy mood to some kind of monster that has no regard for anyone else. This is pain body.

Of course it can be much milder than this.

Let It Be

If you resist the pain body in someone else, this is something it feeds on. It seeks out reaction in other people. These reactions give it strength, give it a reality. If people do not react to it, this implies it is not real, does not exist. It knows that this is the case-it is not ultimately real, so fears this. It becomes confused and possibly more upset when someone does not react to it, after which sometimes a gap of awareness can arise in the person and the pain body can subside.

Remember the pain body is actually enjoying the pain - so let it be.

Even if someone is aware of what a pain body is, when they are trapped in it they can find it very difficult to become conscious and disidentify from it.

Give the other space to be. Respect their right to be annoyed, angry, fearful or whatever. From your point of view the most important thing is to see that it is their pain body acting, not them. Remain conscious and aware so that you do not get pulled in to any egoic reaction yourself. Any thing that is needed to be done or said will the arise from a deeper place of peace within you. You may find that actually nothing needs to be done at all.

Use someone else's pain body as your own spiritual practice - be aware of what reactions or feelings are arising within you. This keeps you very present.

You do not take the other person's actions or behaviour so seriously when you can see that it is the ego or the painbody. This also goes for your own thoughts and emotions. As you are then in a more relaxed and carefree state, the situation becomes an opportunity for peace despite surface disturbance. Do not fear the painbody, this is what it loves. Give it no reality, and it cannot survive.

To sum up, when pain body arises in another:

-Give it no attention, yet allow it to be.

-Remain present and conscious within yourself.

cover of "Undisturbed: A Guide To Emotional Wellness" by Adam Oakley

About Me

Picture of Adam Oakley

My name is Adam Oakley. I'm 35 years old from the UK. This website is a reflection of what has helped me shift away from a mind that was very turbulent, noisy, and rarely at peace, to a state that is far clearer, at peace and also creative. I hope the website and books help you a great deal. 

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I offer personal inner peace guidance sessions  for anyone who would to find inner peace more easily.

"From the start of the session with Adam, I felt at ease. He is a very genuine and peaceful energy. I think that the session was extremely helpful and I took a lot away from it. Personally I think a session with Adam would be helpful to anyone on a path towards consciousness/realization or even just general personal development." - C.M


Cover of "Get Out Of The Cage: A Guide To Inner Freedom" by Adam Oakley of InnerPeaceNow.com